thankfulness

I generally detest holidays that set aside one day to do the things that we should do all year long, like be thankful, celebrate the religious traditions that are uniquely ours, honor our parents, etc. However, if we allow ourselves the opportunity, we can be reminded of how we can live our lives in a celebratory, thankful and honoring manner all year long. So, allow me to add to my list the things for which I am really thankful, and those for which I feel guilty for offering thanks!

First, the real ones:
Family
Friends
Faith
Shelter
Clothing
Food
Spontaneity
Work
Church
Children
Life itself
Husband
Fuyu persimmons
Yosemite
Education
Books


Now the ones that make me feel a bit guilty and self-indulgent:
The internet
Peet's coffee
NFL
Major League Baseball
Cute handbags
Gourmet Cheese
Wine
Office supplies
Christmas music
An afternoon alone at the movies
Jesus Bling (my cross collection)
Days to lounge around in my pajamas

Death does not have the final word

This week one of the saints of our church died after a long illness with lung cancer. Last Saturday, I had one of those "God moment" experiences at the hospital with him and his family. Another pastor and I were there, gathered around the bedside and reading Psalms and preparing to pray. I invited all to pray, and as I usually do, I took a few deep, internal breaths. I seldom just jump into a prayer. Before I could utter any words, our church member started to pray the Lord's Prayer. He had been struggling to breathe, much less talk in any real audible fashion. He was fervent and almost boisterous in his recitation of the prayer. We proceeded and then I closed with a blessing. Last Tuesday, when I stopped in at the hospital again, his daughter pulled me out into the hallway and said that her dad, now in a coma, must have been very moved by my leading the Lord's Prayer. Of course, I was quick to say that I didn't lead it, he did. She went on to say that it was the last thing he had been able to utter before he slipped into an extended sleep and coma. Wow! Is it possible that God really does speak in our breaths, our pauses and yes, even in our prayers? Praise be to God! breathe breathe pause pause wait wait Amen!

Since when did my daughter become more faithful than me?!

So, tonight, after school, my younger daughter comes home from school and confronts me with big issues. She sits me down and says in a nearly tearful way that she's thinking of quitting softball. She's realized (after a weekend away on a leadership team for a Love of God retreat for senior high school students) that her faith is more important that sports. She wonders why she is spending so much time on something that doesn't seem to have a lot of long, or even short term value, to her.
I know this is truly troubling her, since she was already considering quitting softball to take a part-time, after school job. What is stunning, is her thoughtfulness and the intensity of her feelings. She said that she doesn't feel she has the time she needs to develop a real "relationship" with God. She said she knows it isn't just about going to worship on Sundays or going through the motions, it's a way of life! Whoa! Suddenly, I feel I've been leapfrogged. How did my kids get so big, old, mature and smarter than me?

On This Day

On this day
many will say
that history has been made
and it's true

On this day
many will say
that life will change
and it's true

On this day
many will say
dance in the streets and celebrate
for the truth

On this day
many will say
justice has been served
and maybe it's true

On this day
many will say
why the prejudice
and lack of what's true

On this day
many will say
but who will pray?
for all to be true